“People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be.”
― Abraham Lincoln
People could take a lot from the quote that Honest Abe made. Amongst anything, this quote holds onto a lot of truth that many try to ignore. There are so many of us that want “happiness”. Yet, so many of us don’t understand we are the masters of the majority of our happiness. In truth, happiness is as far as your heart reaches.
Ask others, however, they will make the same excuses. So much that life expert and career coach Kathy Caprino had enough of the excuses. In an article written a couple of weeks back, she explained that many people come with excuses [1]. So many people use these excuses so much that they hamper their own happiness. Consequently, excuses tend to take precedence to living with goals and effort.
Personally, I agree with her.
Chocolate covered lie: you are NOT the blame for your own happiness.
Caprino’s Corner
Caprino listed reasons that she was used to hearing from people. There were eight different excuses to be named:
1.) I don’t have the money to do this.
2.) I’m not ready to do the work required to change.
3.) I’m afraid of what I don’t know.
4.) What if it doesn’t work out?
5.) What would people say if I did this?
6.) My family needs me to do this job that I hate?
7.) I don’t really believe it’s going to work out.
8.) This is just me—I can’t change it. [2]
Caprino realized that there is power in words and beliefs. These beliefs are surely named off because they are pretty cancerous to anyone wanting to progress. To put it bluntly, the reasoning people use will leave them assed out in life.
Plus, they are a load of bullshit. More on that in just a second.
Why People’s Beliefs are Bullshit
First off, let us pay attention to the fact that six of the eight excuses deal with inner turmoil. From “I don’t have the money to do this” to “This is just me—I can’t change it”, many of the excuses people give have NOTHING to do with the outside world. A lot of it had to do with one’s personal feelings about themselves. Regardless of anything going on, these excuses don’t really involve the outside world. So, many people are losing out to a defeatist attitude.
The other leftover two just show outright concern for the wrong things. Worrying about “what other people have to say” and “My family needs me to do this job that I hate” put importance on the wrong sentiments. Think about it: rationalizing other people’s opinions is asinine in the voice of self-improvement and being happy. And as leaving a job without having a back-up plan would be premature, it should be noted that an exit strategy should be created so your family will know/understand your desires. Focusing on the opinions of others won’t help; making sense out of life despite opposing opinions does.
The Skinny
When people realize that they are the masters of their fate and the captains of their souls, they will be okay. However, they first need to realize their own importance. They need to figure that they have to take the wheel on the road of life. They need to make sure they accelerate, decelerate, and even press the cruise control button when necessary. In turn, people need to relieve themselves of their own hampering hullabaloo.
‘Nuff said and ‘nuff respect!!!















sanora1
January 20, 2013 at 4:11 pm
Well, …you called that spade a spade! There is no doubt that people need coaching in certain areas. Of course, we all also need to understand that since we all moved off the farm and the industrial revolution took over, there has been a massive push to steer people into jobs within industry, instead of teaching them the merits of being self employed, thereby allowing them a greater level of control in their life. In fact, it is almost a conspiracy of sorts, that has been having it’s way with people for quite some time now. Industry, and the powers that be, want people to have just enough motivation and smarts to perform the variou tasks that need doing, beyond that, they do not want independent thinkers who are too hard to control. People have been duped by a controling faction that they thought was working” for” them, now after generations of being dumbed down, they find it hard to go against a lifetime of conditioning. Add to this the fact that not all people have the same temperment, or personal skills and abilities, and you can see what a challange it can be to try and motivate people these days. Yes people believe many things that just aren’t so,…and the trouble is they all get one vote. Now if we gave five or ten votes to the people who were consistanly more correct, then maybe we would get some place, until then the idiots vote cancals out the Einstein vote.
darcwonn1906
January 20, 2013 at 5:17 pm
I am beginning to see this.
Being an African American, I see this on a daily. The mentality is always “industrial”: who do I work for? Instead, we need more free thinkers, radicals, and independent minded people.
You are absolutely correct: it is an industrial complex fueling this world.
diaryofanegress
January 20, 2013 at 10:35 pm
Remember that the quote came from a self hating Negro.
Are you the cause if your own happiness/ unhappiness?
Yes and no. life circumstance verses opportunity does play a role in it too.
darcwonn1906
January 20, 2013 at 10:44 pm
Self hating or not, the quote has validity.
And you do have a point. But given within the context that I worked with, a lot of people are giving excuses. I’m not trying to discount anything that does happen on the outside (in life). But if we work with the parameters given, then people need to take responsibility for their own happiness.